Supporting a partner who is experiencing depression can be an emotionally challenging journey. It’s not easy to witness someone you love going through the pain and despair that depression brings. At times, you may even feel helpless in supporting your partner. But know that you are not alone, and your commitment to understanding and supporting your partner can strengthen your relationship and even aid their healing journey. Research has shown that supportive social relationships play a crucial role in our mental health and wellness.
Depression is a complex and multifaceted mental health condition that can have a profound impact on individuals and their relationships. The effects of depression extend beyond the one experiencing it and often spill over into their relationships—including their romantic partnerships. In this blog post, we will explore strategies to nurture your relationship while providing the empathetic support your partner needs during their healing journey with depression.
Educating Yourself about Depression
To better support your partner, it’s important to do your own research about depression. Take the time to understand the basics of depression, its symptoms, and its impact on your partner. Learn about the different types of depression, the type your partner experiences if they are diagnosed, and how the symptoms may manifest in their life. By gaining knowledge and insights, you can develop a deeper understanding of what your partner is experiencing and provide more credible, effective support.
It is also crucial to be aware of the signs of suicidal tendencies. Depression can increase the risk of suicidal thoughts or behaviors. If you notice any warning signs, such as talking about death or suicide, withdrawing from activities, or expressing hopelessness, it’s vital to take them seriously. Encourage your partner to seek immediate professional help or reach out to a crisis hotline. If you believe your partner is in immediate danger, do not hesitate to contact emergency services.
Read: Battle Depression with the Hero’s Journey
Showing Empathy, Validation, and Compassion
Practicing empathy is an essential element of supporting your partner through depression. Put yourself in their shoes and try to understand their experience. Avoid judgment or minimizing their feelings. Instead, validate their emotions and experiences. Let them know that their feelings are valid and that you are there to support them.
Using compassionate language is another powerful tool in fostering understanding and connection. Be mindful of your words and tone, choosing phrases that convey empathy and support. Instead of dismissing or trivializing their emotions, acknowledge their pain and offer words of reassurance. For example, saying, “I can’t fully understand what you’re going through, but I’m here for you” or repeating back to them what you do understand, such as, “I can tell you’re feeling hopeless in this situation” can be far more impactful than trying to offer solutions or downplaying their emotions.
Read: Listen Like a Therapist: How To Support Loved Ones With Mental Health Conditions
Offering Practical Support
Depression can make even the simplest tasks feel overwhelming for your partner. Offering practical support can help alleviate some of their burdens. Whether it’s assisting with household chores, running errands, or accompanying them to appointments, your involvement can make a significant difference. Collaborate on problem-solving and decision-making, ensuring that they feel supported in managing daily responsibilities.
Encouraging healthy routines and self-care practices is also crucial. Help your partner establish and maintain healthy habits such as regular exercise, a balanced diet, and sufficient sleep. Engaging in these activities together can create a sense of togetherness and reinforce their commitment to self-care
Read: Guide to Building Your Social Support System (And How to Ask for Help)
Maintaining Intimacy and Connection
Depression can sometimes create emotional distance between partners. Maintaining intimacy and connection becomes all the more important during this time. Nurture emotional intimacy by actively engaging in deep conversations, expressing affection, and showing genuine interest in their thoughts and feelings. Physical intimacy, such as hugging or holding hands, can provide comfort and reassurance.
Exploring activities that promote connection and joy can also be beneficial.Depression can rob individuals of the joy they used to feel for activities they loved, so engage in shared hobbies together or try new experiences. By creating positive memories and moments of laughter, you may help lift some of the weight of depression and strengthen your bond with your loved one.
Taking Care of Yourself
Taking care of yourself is just as important as supporting your partner through their depression. Prioritize self-care and personal well-being by engaging in activities that recharge and rejuvenate you. Make self-care a non-negotiable part of your routine, ensuring that you are nurturing your own physical, emotional, and mental well-being.
Recognize your own emotional boundaries and limitations. Set clear boundaries with your partner to protect your own mental health and prevent burnout. Communicate your needs openly and honestly, and ensure that you are giving yourself the time and space to recharge. Reach out to trusted individuals who can provide a listening ear or offer guidance. Consider seeking therapy or counseling for yourself to explore your own emotions and develop healthy coping strategies. Remember, taking care of yourself is not selfish; it is a necessary part of being a supportive partner. By prioritizing your well-being and seeking support, you can cultivate the strength and resilience you need to continue being there for your partner in a meaningful and sustainable way.
Read: A Love Letter to People-Pleasers
Encouraging Professional Treatment
Professional treatment is a crucial component of managing depression. Encourage your partner to seek therapy or counseling, emphasizing the benefits of professional support. Offer assistance in finding a suitable therapist or treatment approach for depression. If medication is recommended by a healthcare professional, you could assist your partner by helping them remember to take it. By supporting their treatment journey, you are showing your commitment to their well-being and their path to recovery.
Taking the next step to nourish your relationship
Supporting a partner with depression requires patience, understanding, and a commitment to nurturing your relationship. Educating yourself about depression enhances your ability to provide effective support and better understand your partner’s experience—and that’s what you’re doing right now by reading this blog!
But no matter how much research you’re able to do, how much you love your partner, or how much you want to help them, treating your loved one is not your job. If your partner is not seeing a mental health professional yet, now may be the time to have that talk. You may also benefit from couple’s therapy, or seeking individual support from a therapist yourself (even if you feel fine!).
Schedule your first appointment with one of our therapists at Austin Anxiety and Trauma Specialists and we’ll match you to a mental health professional who can best support you and your partner.
It can get better. We can help.
